Mary's Corner

11 Things a Woman can be


11 Things A Woman Can Be

That Are So Much Better Than 'Beautiful'

The Huffington Post  

Here are 11 things a woman can be that are so much more important than “beautiful:”

1. Funny. Being funny gives you the ability to bring joy to anyone around you. Plus, research shows that funny people are more socially attractive. Why wouldn’t you want to be friends with the person cracking jokes all night? And laughter is truly the best medicine.

2. Creative. Creative people observe everything, seek out new experiences, and take risks. They also live longer, which is a pretty great perk.

3. Unapologetic. Not in the way where you don’t apologize when you’ve done something wrong, but in the way where you own exactly who you are -- ***Flawless, natch -- without apology.

4. Spontaneous. Everyone needs that friend they can call about a last-minute concert, movie, ski trip, road trip and everything in-between. Saying "yes" for the sake of experience is underrated.

5. Honest. Even if you're not the type for brutal honesty, having the ability to be direct about your wants and needs is an admirable quality. Plus, lying less is good for your health.

6. Loyal. One of the most important things in any relationship is knowing you can depend on the other person to be on your side and hold you accountable without letting you down. Studies show that people who are loyal in their romantic relationships feel more satisfied with their lives. And loyalty is just as impactful in platonic relationships as romantic ones.

7. Open-Minded. Being willing to learn more about something and potentially change your mind isn't always easy. The effort that takes is worth more than having a pretty face.

8. Thoughtful. People will remember the fact that you called them on their birthday and knew about their dairy allergy at a dinner party for much longer than they'll remember the effort you put into straightening your hair and having perfect nails all the time.

9. Empathetic. Being able to relate to people and imagine yourself in their shoes is something you should never underestimate. Being pretty doesn't help you build friendships the way having empathy does.

10. Generous. Whether it's generosity with your time, your advice, your resources, your skills -- it all matters. Being generous benefits both the receiver and the giver, because giving makes people happy.

11. Reliable. Get's things done. They are there when you need them. Enough said.


Inner Beauty



What does your outward appearance say about your inner beauty?

3 Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2 when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes.4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 5 For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, 6

1 Peter 3:1-5

 In these verses Peter is speaking of married women.  However there is also a great deal of wisdom for women in general in these verses.  Is Peter saying that women should Not wear makeup, jewelry, unique hair styles, or stylish clothes?  No, emphatically NO!  God says that our body is a temple and that we are wonderfully and perfectly made.  Peter instead is teaching that a woman's beauty should not come from outward adornment but from the inner beauty of a sweet gentle spirit. 

It is true that women have always tried to enhance their beauty since the dawn of time. Even in prehistoric times, women and men wore necklaces or bracelets made of things like shells.  All the ancient civilizations used cosmetics. For example, in Iraq in 2,000 BC, perfumes and cosmetics were commonly used. They used pigments to enhance the eyes and lips made  from various minerals. Upper class Egyptian men and women used perfumes and cosmetics such as  black eyeliner and green pigment for their eyelids. Roman women not only used cosmetics they also used rouge for their cheeks. Roman women used razors, pumice stone, tweezers and depilatory creams to remove unwanted body hair. And they used mirrors made of polished metal to make sure their makeup and hair was just right.  They even had facials using exotic ingredients such as crocodile dung (if they could afford it!) to soften or rejuvenate their skin. I bet that was interesting

But what was interesting is that only prostitutes (and some jaded upper class ladies) in the ancient world wore loud or exaggerated makeup, large oversized jewelry and of course revealing clothing to announce their occupation. The average woman of that day dressed modestly and wore very little jewelry, make up or no makeup at all.  Does that mean that Christian women are required to dress like nuns, not wear makeup, wear drab bland shapeless clothing, or even the veil of Muslim women?  No!  Look at nature.  God loves color, texture, shape, ect.  The key for Christians is moderation.  In this passage, Peter is stressing that Christian women should instead concentrate on developing the inner beauty that reflects Christ through their lives'.

Consider this, "all the makeup in the world cannot hide or conceal a bad personality. Because a sour, arrogant, indifferent, surly, angry or bad attitude radiates past makeup, jewelry, hairstyle or clothes like a malfunctioning neon sign creating an instant negative impression.  A beautiful, joyful, kind spirit however radiates out like a star in the night, creating warmth and pleasure to all around them.  Christian women (and men) therefore, should work to reflect the fruits of the Holy Spirit in their lives; love, joy, peace, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, patience and self control.  These attributes can be enhanced in our personalities by actively choosing to exercise them.  We can choose to be kind, we can choose to be gentle and have patience and we can even choose joy despite our circumstances.   Think about this.  If someone were to ask the people in your family or where you work what would they say about your personality?  Would they say, "oh yea she's a Christian" or would they say, "She's a Christian?"

Think about this.   A large portion of all the people who have accepted Christ as Savior and Lord state that they did so because of what they saw in the life of a Christian or Christians and their influence of how they lived.  On the other hand, one of the greatest contributions to people becoming atheist were non Christ-Like people who claim to be Christian but acted like the devil and holier than thou inflexible Christians.    

Mahatma Gandhi once said:

 “I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.”


Ladies, how does your personality reflect to the world?

When we build on our inner beauty and let God work in our hearts, that beauty will shine forth and give confidence (Proverbs 31:30).  If we as women or girls think that the only way to attract a man is with more makeup and less clothes, then the only men we are going to attract is one who is only interested in your outer appearance and will look elsewhere when that fades.

I would rather ( and did) attract a good Christian man who values my worth based on my personality, inner strength and character.  That inner strength and character comes from building on my relationship with God and allowing Him to work in my life.

There will always be some out there that is more pretty or in better shape.  But, if you have worked on your inner beauty, no one can surpass you in God's eyes or the in eyes of that good Christian man.  Not having confidence in yourself leads to jealousy, which can destroy relationships.

There is nothing wrong with taking pride in your appearance, but if you don't take pride and work on your inner beauty, in the end all you have left is a body that changes and ages regardless of what you do.  And remember, Peter said, "it is the inner beauty that is of great worth in God's sight.  A thought to Ponder, "You’re a walking, talking Billboard"  What does your sign say to the world?

Audrey Hepburn wrote

"The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair.  The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart. The place where love resides.  True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul.  It's the caring she lovingly gives, the passion that she shows and the beauty of a women only grows with passing years."

 Points to consider

*Yoga pants, short shorts cut to you know where, cleavage down to your navel, or clothing so tight you can see your heartbeat pulsing.  Remember, men are sexually stimulated by sight!  Is what you are wearing in church or in public causing the men to struggle with lust?  Remember we are as Christians accountable to God for our actions - how we dress is included in that also.

*Teenage girls - you may be dressing to appeal to the boys or just to be fashionable.  Be aware it's not just the boys that are looking.  Males from 10 to 100 are looking to! some with not so good thoughts.



*Dressing like a rag bag, or wearing slovenly, pajama type clothes in public - hmmmm.  Is there a point where people become too casual?

*Unwashed, greasy hair and dirty clothes also make a statement.

*Cussing like a sailor paints a picture of low self-esteem and a very small vocabulary with little education.

*Mean temper - Do you lose your temper easily?  How does that affect those around you?  You might be surprised to hear their thoughts.

 Proverbs 11:22

Like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion.


the quality of behaving or speaking in such a way as to avoid causing offense or revealing private information.


Proverbs 31:30

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

2 Corinthians 3:18New International Version (NIV)

18 And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate[a] the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.


A Virtuous Woman



Proverbs 31:10-31 (KJV)

10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.

12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

13 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.

14 She is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar.

15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.

16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.

17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.

18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.

19 She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.

20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.

21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.

22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.

23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.

24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.

25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.

26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.

30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.

31 Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.


1. Faith - A Virtuous Woman serves God with all of her heart, mind, and soul. She seeks His will for her life and follows His ways. (Proverbs 31: 26, Proverbs 31: 29 – 31, Matthew 22: 37, John 14: 15, Psalm 119: 15


2. Marriage – A Virtuous Woman respects her husband. She does him good all the days of her life. She is trustworthy and a helpmeet. (Proverbs 31: 11- 12, Proverbs 31: 23, Proverbs 31: 28, 1 Peter 3, Ephesians 5, Genesis2: 18)


3. Mothering - A Virtuous Woman teaches her children the ways of her Father in heaven. She nurtures her children with the love of Christ, disciplines them with care and wisdom, and trains them in the way they should go. (Proverbs 31: 28, Proverbs 31: 26, Proverbs 22: 6, Deuteronomy 6, Luke 18: 16)


4. Health – A Virtuous Woman cares for her body. She prepares healthy food for her family. (Proverbs 31: 14 – 15, Proverbs 31: 17, 1 Corinthians 6: 19, Genesis 1: 29, Daniel 1, Leviticus 11)


5. Service - A Virtuous Woman serves her husband, her family, her friends, and her neighbors with a gentle and loving spirit. She is charitable. (Proverbs 31: 12, Proverbs 31: 15, Proverbs 31: 20, 1 Corinthians 13: 13)


6. Finances - A Virtuous Woman seeks her husband’s approval before making purchases and spends money wisely. She is careful to purchase quality items which her family needs. (Proverbs 31: 14, Proverbs 31: 16, Proverbs 31: 18, 1 Timothy 6: 10, Ephesians 5: 23, Deuteronomy 14: 22, Numbers 18: 26)


7. Industry – A Virtuous Woman works willingly with her hands. She sings praises to God and does not grumble while completing her tasks. (Proverbs 31: 13, Proverbs 31: 16, Proverbs 31: 24, Proverbs 31: 31, Philippians 2: 14)


8. Homemaking – A Virtuous Woman is a homemaker. She creates an inviting atmosphere of warmth and love for her family and guests. She uses hospitality to minister to those around her. (Proverbs 31: 15, Proverbs 31: 20 – 22, Proverbs 31: 27, Titus 2: 5, 1 Peter 4: 9, Hebrews 13: 2)


9. Time - A Virtuous Woman uses her time wisely. She works diligently to complete her daily tasks. She does not spend time dwelling on those things that do not please the Lord. (Proverbs 31: 13, Proverbs 31: 19, Proverbs 31: 27, Ecclesiastes 3, Proverbs 16: 9, Philippians 4:8 )


10. Beauty – A Virtuous Woman is a woman of worth and beauty. She has the inner beauty that only comes from Christ. She uses her creativity and sense of style to create beauty in her life and the lives of her loved ones. (Proverbs 31: 10Proverbs 31: 21 – 22, Proverbs 31: 24 -25, Isaiah 61: 10, 1 Timothy 2: 9, 1 Peter 3: 1 – 6)











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